My text messages tend to be more unhinged than what I would ever reveal in person. I feel safe behind text only then; the lack of context, voice tenure, and attitude help me separate the me that thinks those things, and the me that doesn’t mean them.

My favourite one this week was to my Mom, and read, “I’ll have my last will and testament for dinner”, in direct response to her question of (you guessed it) dinner content. TL;DR chronic pain sucks. ♥

I was able to pull my carcass up and make a new theme — I prefer to make themes months ahead of time, but maybe 3 themes on standby is too many? — and BOY DO I REGRET THAT. Couldn’t type worth a shit, had to copy+paste everything, and it ended up being ten times harder. Do not recommend and *claps hands* stay in bed.

I’m in so much pain, but I’ve accomplished a lot despite it. Am I proud of myself? Can’t tell, I’ve reached the “can’t feel emotion” intersection between “probable emergency I’ll ignore” to “I know I prayed for this before, but please don’t kill me in my sleep”.

I hate taking meds for pain, they make me groggy as shit, but if I don’t take them, I’d be sober and in pain.