New Realisations

Back in January when we realised we'd be moving, we as a family decided that, as the cats had destroyed our last house–and I'm talking destroyed; we had to rip up carpet and wash down walls before the place even so much as looked half-way decent–the new place would be cat free; we'd be keeping all eight of them, but they would remain outside, through rain or snow1.

I personally decided for my two cats, Jonn Beneé and TJ, that Jonn Beneé would remain inside my room with her own kitty box, and TJ would remain an outside cat2. While Jonn Beneé slept with me every night at the old place, she a) didn't always spend her every waking (and sleeping) moment with me and b) she didn't have a kitty box, so she knew that she could not stay in my room for the whole day.

I underestimated Jonn Beneé. I really, really did. I thought she'd be OK–was a fact that my dog, Baby, took the move the hardest–but I didn't think she'd try to drive me fucking ape crazy:

  1. Jonn Beneé wakes me up every morning. I know this, because she woke me up anywhere between 4-7 at the old place to be let out. I don't know why she continues to–I always make sure her bowls are filled up before bed–but she does. A part of me thinks it's because she's a cuddler, and a huge one at that. It doesn't matter where I am, as long as I am not standing, she's there, ready to lay in my lap or sit on my face.
  2. Driving the cuddling point home: I was having some “fun time” with a certain mechanical toy one night, and as this is usually when we cuddle, she couldn't get the hint that we could not share this toy. I had to interrupt my nice pace several times to push her off of me, before pushing her off the bed. I don't understand this either, because when I push TJ off, he more than gets the hint.
  3. I didn't notice this before–which is hard, considering I've raised her since she practically came out of the womb–but she's extraordinarily vocal. She mostly does this when she's angry or irritated, but once again, when it comes to morning time, she's chirping away. One thing to know about Tess: despite me being able to adjust to any schedule, I'm not a morning person, and I don't want to hear anything for the first hour or so.
  4. I have this ritual, and Jonn Beneé has mostly attuned herself to it, and a little too much if you ask me. Night time (not bed time) is when I close the blinds–she absolutely cannot peak through them or touch them unless the blinds are up–and when the lamp switches on. Bed time is when the lamp switches off and the laptop goes down. I crawl into bed, having put something-or-other on, and am immediately…assaulted with the smell of cat ass. Apparently, she likes shitting best when I'm laying down, so I can roll around in the smell. Cue in the least favourite perfume–most perfume wearers have this–which is sprayed around the room in frantic sweeping motions.
  5. Blind freak ahoy! She likes a specific spot on a box, which gives her lots of access to lizards (that she can't eat–another thing she tells me about) and people. She's very nosy, » as you can see.
  6. A few others: she takes up most of my bed when she sleeps on it–which is 99.9% of the time. She likes sitting on my papers–I've given her own, which she constantly tears to pieces–she likes having plenty of water, and will make a fuss if she doesn't have much and she's getting fat. Not enough exercise, apparently. She's also as miffed as I am about Smallville's past season, and has declared claim over a » certain somebody (just like me with the whole manly men thing3), which also happens to attest to her stealing my laptop space, whether my laptop is actually there or not.

Let this be a warning to all: having a cat is cool and all, it's great, but think before you commit. I know it sounds all cute, but this is me exercising a great deal of patience on my end. Of course, this isn't to say cats are horrible–they are beautiful, beautiful creatures, and I wouldn't give mine (or the family's, for that matter!) up for the world.

  1. OK, not really. We let them into the laundry room (it's a regular sized room, but we have to put insulation into it) when the weather gets bad.
  2. TJ was raised by our neighbours as an outside cat–not exactly how I wanted him to be raised, but he prefers it.
  3. According to Christina, that's what my preference is. Like I asked her. (:D)

Posted: July 2, 2009
Listed Under: Animals, General, Photography, Real Life
Tags: jonn benee, moving, photos

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